That Knot Without End

“Eu sou braço de maré- Paraná
mas eu sou o mar sem fim”

- lyric from Parana E


Winston sits on the family room floor. “Sing Paraná é,” he says, “my fairy is doing capoeira.” He has been requesting this song with greater and greater frequency lately. I have read the song’s translation, I can understand.

I sing the song’s chorus over and over. It is the only part I know.

“Nice try, Mama,” he says.

“Thanks, buddy.” I return to my book. I am still reading “Children of a Child-Centered School.” Norman read over my shoulder for a bit this morning. He is curious to see what is inside of a book which so frequently brings tears to my eyes. It has been a very moving read.

Norman pulls the song up on his laptop. Winston begins to bend and twist his fairy again. “Daddy can play capoeira.”

Norman joins him. He does a “cat walk” over Winston.

“Not like that, Daddy!” Norman stands up and thinks for a moment. He saunters across the room. I think he is going to plunk himself back down in front of his computer. This time, he gets Baby Ella.

Baby Ella joins the fairy’s jota. She and Fairy play capoeira.

My son and his father sit on the family room floor. Paraná é plays in the background. The fairy doll and baby doll play capoeira.

Do nó escondo a ponta- Paraná
ninguém sabe desatar- Paraná

- lyric from Paraná é

Ancestors fill his heart-spirit with chatter. They’ll be with us for quite awhile. I am recalling.
I saw this once upon a time, a long time ago.
I dreamt a heavy huge belly dream and my son kicked me for the first time.

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