Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Serenity & The Lessons Old Houses Teach

Meditations on Acceptance, Selling a A House, Chasing a Toddler and Moving To England while meeting the Deadline For A Contract and Nurturing The Firstborn’s Transition To College

I see Serenity. How ancient and voluptuous she is. The grapes peel themselves for her. Levitate into her perfect mouth. Shiver with joy as her teeth mash, tongue presses, throat constricts around them. This is how she touches everything.

Isn’t she terrifying and seductive?

Old houses - like old women - have secrets, mysteries and frailties. This is their charm and challenge - helping them stay vibrant, strong and healthy long enough to understand a small fraction of their patience, forgiveness and wisdom.

I shall sit in Serenity’s lap today. Children, after all, imitate their parents.

Dancing around my dorm room, I used to sing along with Kate Bush’s song “Lionheart.”
There is power in words. Now, look what I’ve done. Oh, good.

Dear Sisyphus,

You have been a very bad role model.
I shall not even glance in the direction of the boulder today.
I will dance away from the hill.
What you are doing no longer looks poetic.


Oh, look! There’s what I was seeking!

Yes, she has called again today during nap time knowing full well it is nap time and her brother prefers to have company when he naps. This precludes phone calls, email checking or otherwise engaging in anything but nursing.

I am glad she calls home whenever she calls home. Even daily at naptime.

I certainly never wanted to call home.

* * *
The origin of the word sacrifice is “to make sacred.” Surrender is not always defeat. Be aware of to what you give voice. Peace is terrifying and comfortable. Have faith in vision. Embrace circumstance. Be thankful. Be thankful. Be thankful. Happiness is not everything you want, but an understanding of how to shape and define your own desires.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

this is your friend the Goddess sending you moonbeams and stars. She would like to remind you that you are on your Path to compassion, joy, breath and silence. We love you.